Mood:  don't ask
Now Playing: Prima Donna Revisited
Topic: rants
Now, I am PISSED. Little Miss Aldonza went out and got her own costume. She's not the only one in the cast who has done that, but the other actor brought in something that is perfect. He looks entirely in keeping with the rest of the show. SHE, on the other hand, is wearing a white shift, a leather bustier, and a rust-coloured skirt with a print of black blotches that looks suspiciously like abstract leopard print. And the director is going to allow it because it's the "path of least resistance." He actually had the gall to say that to me!

Last night, while the bitch was refusing to look at what I had been labouring over for three hours, she informed me that the velcro had come loose on her petticoat. I told her to see the stage manager for a sewing kit and fix it herself!

We are an all-volunteer theatre. No paid staff, dressers, janitors, or ladies' maids. People who work with us have to accept that.

Musings on Being In Theater
Mood:  chatty
Now Playing: Age Before Beauty
Topic: clothing
I've been hanging around the Sam Bass Community Theatre since it was known as the Sam Bass Theater Association (SBTA). That was a while back. I started out a terrified neophyte who had to be taught stage right from stage left. By the time the director had coaxed me out from behind the furniture, I had "the bug." I remained tremulous through about 6 shows. Sometime in there, the fun began to outweigh the fear.

My second adventure into acting was a lovely show called, "Come Back to the Five and Dime, Jimmy Dean, Jimmy Dean." Edna Louise, my character was an intriguing mix of dingbat and doormat. I knew I could handle that. She eventually confronts the bully who has been verbally abusing her through two acts; something I had never done. I found out that acting this out every day for a couple of months changed my life.

The Son of a Siberian Sasquatch was not really overjoyed with my new-found sense of independence. Somehow, my "meek factor" was just not up to snuff. I was out of there within the year.

Costuming
Mood:  rushed
Now Playing: #@%&* Actresses!
Topic: rants
Well, I've got one! Haven't had one in years, but now I've got one! A genuine, bona fide, card carrying Diva! The lead actress in the play I am costuming at present has all sorts of input and ideas about what her costume needs to look like. I was told, several days before the costumes need to be there, that she needs to be able to tear a strip off her skirt or petticoat to make a bandage. No problem. Velcro is a wonderful thing! Then, when I call her to ask how big a bandage, I find out she needs from 2 to 4 bandages, a couple of which are props, not costume elements at all! While I'm digesting this, and factoring in a trip to the craft shop for more velcro, I am informed that she needs bloomers, as well. OK--anything to make an actress feel comfortable!

Then she tells me that her skirt should be red-orange, and she should have another for after the rape, this one to be a pale, virginal blue! She offers to email me pics of what she wants. When the email arrives, the pics take ages to unzip. I finally get them, and, guess what!? She has done this show before! And she wants the same costume she had for the last production of it! Oh, and to top that, she wants to know if she should be shopping for flesh-coloured tights, or if I'm going to supply them.

Our theatre is very small, and the actors are practically in the laps of the audience; I'm sure a few people would be wondering why Aldonza was wearing tights! I'm considering telling her that, not only will she not be wearing tights, but that she is required to let the hair grow on her legs for the entire run of the show!

Wait till I tell her she will be wearing a purple satin corset, covered with ragged black lace!

Never, NEVER, piss off your costumer!

Now Playing: Anne Of Green Gables
Topic: clothing
Teenagers and period costumes! What a combination! Sometimes I wonder what they think is going to happen when they audition successfully for a period play. From the general tenor of the complaints, I have decided the following:

Kids do not wear structured clothing, and find anything that doesn't stretch very uncomfortable. Did they think the were going to do Anne of Green Gables in hip-huggers and a tank top?

They have no concept of where their waists actually are. This leads to a rather interesting look, with their slave belts, or whatever, showing over their skirts.

One actress, partially dressed in one costume for the first time; she was wearing the bodice and the petticoat. She had the skirt (which matched the top) in her hand. She asked, "Does this go on over or under the petticoat?"

The garment we oldtimers refer to as a "camisole," is not the same garment these days, and girls have no idea what a slip is. They also tried to trade costume elements, as if costume were in no way connected with character. Socks were considered to be disposable items, even my lovely argyle knee socks.

With a couple of exceptions, the kids were polite and very pleasant to work with. I'd do it again in a heartbeat!

Mood:  caffeinated
Now Playing: Costume Ramblings
Topic: clothing
I've been costuming plays at a couple of community theatres for about 20 years. Never anything huge, like dragons; and my main skill is in adapting modern clothes to suggest period. Thank the goddess of costumes for "retro!"

I have learned a few things about theater costuming on a miniscule budget. I do work for a school, as well, so budget becomes very important there, too.

Currently, I'm working on a small production of Man of La Mancha. At the Sam Bass Community Theatre, every production is necessarily small. We tend toward minimalist sets, a lot of which have been downright ingenious.

The main consideration in costuming in such a space is the fact that there is very little distance between the actors and the audience.

But, back to what I've learned. First, in roughly chronological order, do not put a woman onstage in white flats, especially if the stage is at about eye-level. The audience becomes totally distracted, and carries away the impression of a woman with very large feet. Along with that, it is remarkably easy to upstage a character almost completely, by use of costume. An actess loves to hear from audience members that they were anticipating her next entrance, but the bloom goes off the rose a bit when that is followed by, "I couldn't wait to see what you'd come out in!"

One of the most important is the following: Actors: never, EVER piss off your costumer. The results can be very uncomfortable. I was in a show being costumed by a professional and very talented designer. From day one, the lead actress was very emphatic that she should have input into her costume choices. Not to put too fine a point upon it, she insisted on wearing a black gown. The director seemed unwilling to come right out and say, "No!" After some lame arguments, the costumer spoke up and said, "Oh, for heaven's sake! The set is going to be black; if you wear black, you'll disappear!" The actress retired with the sulks. The amazing thing was that when her costume was finally built, it required two dressers, its own undergarment, four safety pins, and nearly four minutes to get onto her, and when assembled, made her look twenty pounds heavier. It's OK for an actor to tell a costumer of any issues of import, such as a wool allergy. And issues of fit, if not apparent to the costumer, need to be brought to her attention. I fitted a boned dress onto a young actress recently, and had her ask if it could be taken in about half an inch. It looked fine to me, but I agreed to do it, thinking I had something of a prima donna on my hands. When I found out that she was a dancer, I realized that she was used to having structured costumes very tightly fitted. It's good to have actors comfortable, if possible.

It's raining again, and I'm gleefully watching the sweater I put out in the low spot in the back yard acquire the proper patina. It's almost time to turn it over and stomp on it some more. "Distressing" costumes is one of the little joys of the job.

Now Playing: I Love Clothes
Topic: clothing
I don't like shopping for new clothes. I'm not sure, but I think they are producing everything from the same sweatshop. I comb Thrift Shops, Goodwills and garage sales for my needs. I buy things I like, things I may be able to adapt for a play, things that may come in handy for a period plays in the future, and things that scream: "What were they thinking?!"

Around the house, I wear Tshirts and jammies. When dressing up, I wear vintage or classic styles. I'm sort of vintage, myself, so it all fits.

I am always on a quest for comfortable dress shoes. I'm beginning to think there is no such thing. The shoes I wore all day long, in my youth, send shooting pains through my feet in less than an hour, nowadays.

Some of my favourite garments are long formal kilts. I know that, traditionally, women did not wear kilts, but, if they're going to make them, I'm going to wear them. They look dressy and flattering. They are Style, not Fashion.

Mood:  chillin'
Now Playing: Christopher Cat in Chicago
Topic: Cats
I've had a lot of cats in my life. Some have come and gone, leaving little imprint on my mind. Others created memories that have lasted for many years. Such a one was Christopher.

Christopher Cat came to me on St Patrick's Day in 1972. He was a sleek little orange tabby, and got his name because a boy I went to school with, whose name was Patrick, had a brother named Christopher. At first, he was an apartment cat, in Gary IN. Later, we moved out to the Indiana Dunes, and he had freedom to roam the dunes and beaches of that kitty paradise. About a year after I got him, we moved to Chicago, where (ex)husband and I managed an apartment building. It was an old building on the north side, near the shore. I had a long talk with Christopher, explaining that he had to go back to being an apartment cat, and why. It didn't take. He paced the small apartment like a caged tiger, and would make a mad dash for the door whenever it was opened. Once, before I could catch him, some misguided tenant had let him out the front door. After searching for an hour or so, I went back inside, hoping, by some miracle, that he would come back. Shortly after dark, I heard a noise at our second-storey window--and there he was. While I was letting him in, I noticed The Tree. It was a fairly large tree, growing right outside. He had come up The Tree, out a branch, and onto the windowsill. The question I never did answer was, how did he know which apartment?

After that, he came and went as he pleased, out the window and down The Tree.

I think that every neighbourhood in Chicago has it's people who feed the stray or wild animals. Ours had the Pigeon Lady, the Cat Lady, and the Squirrel Lady. It wasn't long before Christopher had met, won over, and mooched food from all of them. We were first apprised of this phenomenon when little baggies of chopped liver started appearing on Chris's windowsill. By this time, Chris was a large, sleek, well-fed cat. Noticeably not in need of the Cat Lady's offerings.

One day, I decided to follow him around. He had a definite route he took throughout the block, careful to encounter all three food providers. Pigeon Lady was the first. She was scattering corn, knee deep in birds, when Chris found her. She saw him coming, and reached in her bag. Out came a little dish, and a packet of Tender Vittles. Chris graciously accepted this, took his time eating, while I explained to the Pigeon Lady that he was mine, and was very well-fed at home. I figured she could feed a couple three pigeons for the price of the food she was giving my cat. She was very nice about it, but let me know that she would feed whatever she pleased, thank you very much. By this time Christopher Cat was ready to move on. The Squirrel Lady was the next person on Chris's list. She sat quietly on a bench under a tree, enticing squirrels with peanuts. Chris cheerfully scarfed the handful of Cat Chow she put on the bench for him. I went into my routine again, with much the same results. Chris tried to look predatory when the squirrels got close, but his tummy was too full for it to be very successful. The last stop was a ground floor apartment across the alley. The back door was open, and the fragrance of sauteed liver wafted enticingly on the breeze. The darn cat walked right in, and scarfed the dish of chopped sauteed liver that Cat lady put down for him. This was obviously a routine. Once again (this was getting old), I gave my spiel. I asked her about the sauteed offerings on the windowsill, and she explained that, if he didn't drop in of a morning, she went to him with the food. I just shook my head, and Chris and I wended our way home.

Funerals, Weddings and Bar Mitzvahs
Now Playing: Suitable Attire
Topic: clothing
When my mom died, in 1977, it was a shock. As far as I knew, she was in pretty good shape, for a 70+ woman who smoked like a chimney.

My (ex)husband and I, and our brand new baby, lived in Austin at the time, and most of our friends were acoustic musicians. We got together for barbecues, and the most heated discussions were along the lines of whether Blind Lemon Jefferson was a better blues man than Leadbelly.

That's just to point out that our social life was not sartorially demanding. Our money was spent on food, diapers, beer and guitar strings, not clothes.

My wardrobe contained nothing that was suitable for a funeral. Even if it had, it wouldn't have fit, due to my post-natal status. So, I borrowed a dress. I was assured by the lender that it was just the thing for a funeral, because she had bought it to wear to her father's wake the year before. It was navy blue, with white polka dots. Fine with me, as Mom had always said she wanted no black at her funeral. It was a mini, made of that sleazy polyester jersey so popular in the 1970's. And it was a bit snug in strategic places, due to my aforementioned post-natal status.

So, dressed up in the "suitable" dress, baby in arms, I was on my way up the aisle at the funeral home, to take my last look at my mother's face, when I heard a ripping sound and felt a draft. Yup, the worst had happened. The cheap plastic zipper had succumbed to stress. I stood in front of my grieving father and about 100 of his closest friends, suffering a major wardrobe malfunction. I unwrapped my baby daughter, threw her blanket over my shoulder, and quietly walked out.

A very nice lady, who eventually became my stepmother, had a purseful of pins. She came to my rescue, and the funeral proceeded.

I learned two things that day. The first was that every adult should keep in his/her wardrobe an outfit suitable for weddings, funerals and Bar Mitzvahs. Two, actually--for different seasons. Something neutral in colour, conservative in cut, that can be dressed up or down with scarves or jewelery. It doesn't have to be fashionable, just suitable. And that includes shoes. I have never since been without such a costume.

The second lesson was, ALWAYS carry safety pins.

My Mom
Mood:  caffeinated
Now Playing: part one
Topic: Personal
My mother was born in 1905, and died in 1977, just days after the birth of my older daughter, Chandra. She never saw her grandchild.

She was born in New York state, and her mother died when she was nine. She had one sister and two brothers. When she died, she didn't have their addresses so we could let them know. Not a real close family.

She was the stuff of pioneers. Absolute master of making something out of nothing. When we were so poor that she had to put peanut butter in the soup for added protein, she didn't know she was imitating an African recipe. She could do it all, from plowing a field, to cleaning a chimney, to knitting lace. She braided rugs, made table-top mosaics from asphalt tile, wrought iron-looking decorations from tin cans, Christmas ornaments from cigarette foil--she did her best never to waste anything. She would put the gleanings from her hairbrush out in the bushes for the birds to use in their nests. I am surprised she didn't save them to knit me a sweater!

I have an old, granny-square crocheted afghan that contains left-over wool from a twin set she knit for me when I was four. I can find remnants in there of many knitting projects. Even though it is in pitiful condition, I will never get rid of it; it binds me to my mother forever.

Today
Now Playing: Rain
Topic: Weather
Today it is raining. A cold drizzle that reminds me of England or Vancouver Island. When I was a child in England, girls didn't wear long pants, except for play-wear. I had chronic cold, wet knees. I was a skinny little thing, with no insulation. Discomfort was a way of life.

Here, in Central Texas, this kind of light, persistent rain is a Godsend. It soaks into our thirsty earth, instead of running off and taking a good portion of the thirsty earth with it. It will be a good year for Spring crops, including chiggers, fire ants and mosquitoes.

I don't garden. For a person with an English background, this is tantamount to heresy, and a certain disappointment for my parents. We have nearly an acre of land here, and the only thing we grow is grass for deer. We love deer. We feed deer, probably to the disgust of most of our neighbours. The general feeling in these parts is that deer are all very well during hunting season, but the rest of the time, they are a nuisance. They eat the garden and get tangled in the bumpers of cars. There's a reason for the 25 mph speed limit through our neighbourhood.

Back to gardening. I loathe it. I am blessed with good fingernails, which grow very nicely if I don't abuse them too much. The feeling of dirt under them is abhorrent to me.

My parents were gardening fools. There was a vegetable garden at home, of about 1/4 acre, plus raspberry canes, strawberry pyramids, fruit trees, and the blackberry bush that had to be beaten back every few days. The slogging started in March, and continued until October. The digging, planting, tending, weeding, picking, canning and freezing made a full-time job for my mother, and part-time for Dad. Eventually, they got tired of my griping, and let me keep house and make meals instead. I wasn't real wild about doing that, either, but it was better than scrabbling around in the freezing mud.